Thought For The Day 03/01/14



Post 1083



Forgiving is love’s toughest work, and love’s biggest risk.  If you twist it into something it was never meant to be, it can make you a doormat or an insufferable manipulator.  Forgiving seems almost unnatural.  Our sense of fairness tells us people should pay for the wrong they do.  But forgiving is love’s power to break nature’s rule. 

Lewis B. Smedes


There can be no loss greater for any human being than losing a child. It is not a loss I have ever personally experienced so it is doubtful I can truly commiserate with those mothers who have. I can but watch, from afar, as tears flow and difficult decisions are made including funeral arrangements and other attempts to memorialize the life that was lost before even really having the opportunity of living. I can but look with admiration as the tears stop and the continuing of living with a profound emptiness, begins for these families….for these mothers. And it is with the heart of being a mother, that is my only connection to these families….to these mothers! Although I see the pain from fathers, and siblings displayed with such heartbreak, there remains a profound difference for mothers, and that IS something I truly understand!


A mother experiences the instinctive nurturing of an embryo even before sharing the wonderful news with her spouse and the rest of the world, that a new life is joining the human race. A mother feels the growth of this life in utero with each pound gained and each millimeter increase of abdominal size. A mother feels the first movements of that growing life and the fierce protectiveness of her child begins. Every loud noise produces a protective hand over an ever-expanding belly. The response of a baby in utero to the sound of their mother’s voice….soft, caressing, soothing….will often find a quieting of the babe who has not yet seen her face, and is another experience so unique as to be one never forgotten! And the pains of labor so intense and so quickly forgotten as a tiny human is placed in arms that have been aching to hold this miracle for 9 months, commences, and becomes an immediate part of her heart and soul. Such is my capacity to understand the mothers who have lost a child.


And knowing first hand everything that goes into the creation of the miracle that is motherhood, it is with a tremendous sense of admiration that I tell you of the capacity of one of these mothers as she finds the strength to forgive. A woman of such profound faith that her belief in the power of forgiveness to truly release pain felt in a heart still raw in its grief, is worthy of not just acknowledging but embracing as well.


Ohio school shooting victim Demetrius Hewlin was blessed with this mother. Phyllis Ferguson told an interviewer, “You have to accept things done and move on.” And with her next breath, she added the words she would tell 17-year-old TJ Lane, whose action took her beloved son, “I would tell him I forgive him because, a lot of times, they don’t know what they’re doing. That’s all I’d say.” And those three words, I FORGIVE YOU, say it all!


Phyllis Ferguson, you are my hero and a person whose character is worthy of emulating. And, having spoken the nearly impossible, I believe you have pleased our Heavenly Father, most certainly earning your place at his side one day, in a wondrous place where you will be reunited with your precious son, Demetrius! Yes, you are indeed blessed!


And when he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of anyone, they are forgiven; if you withhold forgiveness from anyone, it is withheld.”

John 20:22-23 ESV



Copyright © 2011-2013 “MandysPath” Ministry


About Mandy Bruscella

Mandy's Story: As a Registered Professional Nurse with Certification in a number of specialties including home care, I was afforded the opportunity of working closely with various Social Service Agencies in NY and NJ. ~ A lifelong Christian, I was ordained as a Presbyterian deacon in 1993 and, after relocating to SC in 2000, elected to become ordained as a non-denominational minister. ~ I established "MandysPath" Ministry in 2011. "MandysPath" Ministry is a member of Pacific Life Church, El Sobrante, CA, network of ministries. ~ I direct an outreach ministry in an alternative setting, providing spiritual care to a congregation of more than 500 people from around the world via the Internet. ~ As part of this outreach, I write a daily faith based blog. In March, 2012 I was asked to become a board member of Heroes For Children which is a non-profit foundation, established to assists the Guardian ad Litem program of Horry County, SC. Guardians ad Litem are a group of court appointed advocates who represent the best interests of children in Family Court proceedings involving allegations of abuse or neglect. Working closely with these men and women who make a difference in the lives of children, I completed training and have been sworn in to serve as a Guardian ad Litem for the state of South Carolina . ~ I have been married since 1975 to a wonderful man, Daniel. I have a son Daniel and his wife Melissa who live in NYC. My daughter Sabrina and my grandson Landon live here in SC. ~ My father Harold continues to share his wisdom with me and is responsible for many of the ideas I write about!

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