Tears in Heaven!
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http://bahesti.files.wordpress.com/2011/03/air-mata.jpg
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We say that the hour of death cannot be forecast, but when we say this we imagine that hour as placed in an obscure and distant future. It never occurs to us that it has any connection with the day already begun or that death could arrive this same afternoon, this afternoon which is so certain and which has every hour filled in advance.
Marcel Proust
http://quotegarden.com/death.html
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Somehow today it seems appropriate to me to share with you a song that was written by Eric Clapton and Will Jennings a number of years ago. It is a deeply personal song which describes the heartbreak Clapton experienced following the death of his Four Year Old son Connor who fell to his death from a Manhattan high-rise apartment window on March 20, 1991. The angst Clapton felt quickly became one of his most successful songs, reaching number 2 on the Billboard Hot 100 singles chart in the U.S. and garnered numerous awards including three Grammy’s, and an MTV Video Music Award. But as with what happens when we grieve, the time for public sharing of this song passed for Clapton and he stopped performing it in 2004, saying, “I didn’t feel the loss anymore, which is so much a part of performing those songs. I really have to connect with the feelings that were there when I wrote them. They’re kind of gone and I really don’t want them to come back, particularly. My life is different now…”
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Unfortunately for the world, life really isn’t so very different. Life continues on for us all and a very real part of life is the time when the inevitable occurs…..Death! Yesterday I learned of two very unique and yet not so different families who mourn today the loss of sons. One family in known widely throughout the United States. The other is known only through our very small local community of golfers who play together every week and have done so for years now. And yet both now share the pain and anguish of having children pre-decease them. Garrett Reid was but 29. Gary Murphy, son of our dear friends, was in his mid 40’s. Both should have had a lifetime of living left. But both were taken home by our Heavenly Father at His time of choosing, not ours. We can not answer the question why, because just as God proclaimed to Moses in Exodus 3:14 (NIV), “I AM WHO I AM. This is what you are to say to the Israelites: ‘I AM has sent me to you.'”, so does Death come at its own time. And all we can do is join together, and cry together and talk about our loss together and then we wake up tomorrow and put one foot in front of the other once more.
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TEARS IN HEAVEN
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Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven?
Would you feel the same
If I saw you in heaven?
I must be strong and carry on
‘Cause I know I don’t belong here in heaven
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Would you hold my hand
If I saw you in heaven?
Would you help me stand
If I saw you in heaven?
I’ll find my way through night and day
‘Cause I know I just can’t stay here in heaven
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Time can bring you down, time can bend your knees
Time can break your heart, have you begging please, begging please
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Beyond the door there’s peace I’m sure
And I know there’ll be no more tears in heaven
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Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven?
Would you feel the same
If I saw you in heaven?
I must be strong and carry on
Cause I know I don’t belong here in heaven
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Click the link to see the You Tube video
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I do not have any sage words of wisdom on what to say to these families. Like almost everyone else, I, too, worry about what to say to people who are grieving. But that is the time when it is sometimes best not to speak except to say, “I’m sorry!” and “Do you feel like talking?” Knowing how to listen at times like this is much more important than knowing what to say. But don’t let being uncomfortable keep you from sharing the grief others feel. You accomplish more by the gift of your presence that you do by the gift of your words.
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14″For here we have no lasting city, but we seek the city that is to come.”
Hebrews 13:14 ESV
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